It never ends…

I’ve had a bad night with my youngest.  She was off school yesterday. She came back from her weekend with her father, complaining of tummy ache and saying that her heart hurt. Her symptoms seemed to suggest she had indigestion and heartburn. Her eating habits when she’s with her dad are not what I would…

Heartbreaking

By far the hardest part of this whole process, is the sadness and turmoil it is causing my children. Especially my youngest. They are on this shitty roller coaster too. For months she has been doing very well. Moments of sadness, but nothing major. I thought she’d got over the worst. That we were all…

Wonders ceased already

Arrrrggggghhhhh! I should have known it was too good to be true. Less than 48 hours after our Wonders Never Cease chat, the ex has taken exception to the ‘tone’ of an email my solicitor sent. Both her and I received terse messages on the back of it. She is aghast. And so am I. Her…

Tears

No song. No quotes. Just a picture of my tear-stained eye. I can’t stop crying today. I had the most vivid dream last night. One that would have been mundane, quotidian, unremarkable – before the bomb. Us, together as a family, sharing a meal in a restaurant (not one that I know). Hand holding. Hugs.…

Say Something!

Say something, I’m giving up on you. I’ll be the one if you want me to Anywhere I would’ve followed you. Say something, I’m giving up on you. And I… am feeling so small It was over my head. I know nothing at all. And I… will stumble and fall, I’m still learning to love.…

Limbo

Rippin’ my heart was so easy, so easy, Launch your assault now, take it easy. Raise your weapon, raise your weapon, one word and it’s over. Rippin’ through like a missile, Rippin’ through my heart, Rob me of this love. Raise your weapon, raise your weapon… and it’s over. Love your ego, you won’t feel…

Anxious

   So the formal divorce wheels are well and truly in motion, and with them is coming a whole new set of things to contend with.  The emotional rollercoaster is running away with itself.  Joining the old, familiar ‘favourites’ of sadness, low mood, sleeplessness, panic attacks and spontaneous and uncontrollable crying, are feelings of guilt…